what to do about a friend who is always in competition

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In a globe of comparing, it is oft a subconscious decision to re-create those effectually us. When you're the ane being copied, information technology tin can be very taxing. You deserve the power to claim the things you practice equally originally yours, and yours solitary. If you accept a friend that's copying y'all, you can take action to help them get an original and stop beingness just like you. Earlier getting mad and over-reacting, recollect "False is the sincerest course of flattery." They're not copying yous to upset you, it's more probable that they wish to emulate you.

1. 1

   Effigy out if they're actually copying you. We all have egos, and sometimes they get over-inflated. It's part of human being nature to believe others perceive us the same mode that we practice and that they desire to be like us. This may not be the case. Ask your other friends to come across if they've noticed copying. If they haven't noticed anything, drop it. If it becomes a more serious state of affairs, they'll bring it upwardly.

2. 2

   Think nigh how big of a problem it is. Reframe the situation: instead of thinking of your friend as copying you, you could take it as your friend admiring your good judgment and taste. Peradventure they simply need someone to look upwards to—especially if they've just lost one—and they've called you. While information technology might be abrasive, it may be a temporary affair. Don't be besides quick to react on this situation because it may result in the loss of a friend.^[1]

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3. 3

   Consider if something else is bothering you. While copying can experience a bit similar identity theft, there might exist something else bothering you. If this other trouble is existence projected onto the copying trouble, the copying trouble seems worse than it truly is. If something else is bothering you, don't take it out on your friend. Allow them take their moment and focus on yourself. Simply considering they wore the same color shirt every bit you lot did to schoolhouse, or said they had the same favorite meal, doesn't make them a copier.

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1. 1

   Ask them nearly it. Hash out it with them. They might not even realize that they're copying yous. Sit down down with them and brand certain they're aware of it and divulge into potential reasons for information technology. Don't attack them, make it a discussion.

   • "Did you discover that we've been matching a lot lately?"
     • If they say no, requite them examples.
   • "Do you think information technology'due south funny that nosotros always end up doing the same matter?"
   • "Why do you think these things happen?"

2. 2

   Talk virtually their originality. Ask them how they describe their style or personality. If they accept trouble doing so, it'll help them see that they've been copying you. Remember, information technology's likely there will be similarities betwixt you—that's why y'all're friends—but they should as well have some original ideas.

   • "The whole point of clothes is to highlight your own unique style, how do you lot remember you'd describe your way."
   • "How do y'all see yourself?"

3. 3

   Point out what y'all like almost them. Give them examples of things they've idea of on their own that you liked. Testify them that they also have good, original ideas. Be vague when you practise this, so that you lot don't give away all of your preferences.^[2]

4. four

   Allow them talk. This is going to exist the turning point to brand them stop copying you. Once you make them aware of the state of affairs, yous need to let them comport the chat. This will testify them that they accept the ability to form their ain ideas and that will behave over into any aspect of life they've been copying from you.

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1. one

   Help them detect their uniqueness. If they've been copying your outfits, go through their cupboard with them. Have them create outfits without your assistance and betoken out good things about them. If they've been copying the way you act, exit it to them to make the starting time move and hold with whatever they choose. Give them confidence in their decision-making, and they'll be less likely to copy y'all.^[3]

2. 2

   Force them to do their own thing. If they truly seem to have difficulty understanding that they're copying you, don't tell them your plans. Secrets are never good for a friendship, but you may have to keep some so that they make choices for themselves. Make them decide on upcoming plans and purchases. Don't requite them an answer about where you lot want to go or what you want to do. Let them do it.

3. 3

   Build their confidence. Continue to bespeak out what you similar about their style or ideas. Proceed in mind that people that copy chronically typical suffer from extreme insecurity. They take low self-esteem. Get your mutual friends in on it to aid build their confidence. Back up them in every choice they make, even if information technology seems over the pinnacle. This will assist them become a confident, independent person.^[four]

4. 4

   Make sure they practice things they similar to do. This is an easy way to build cocky-esteem. When you exercise something you enjoy doing, it's something that gives y'all comfort and confidence. Aid your friend practise something they like to do every single day.^[5]

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Add New Question

• Question

  What do I practice if my friend keeps copying what I read and what I draw?

  

  Ask them to do their ain work. Zip is worse than getting a 0 for someone else copying your work.

• Question

  How exercise I finish someone from copying what I desire to be when I'm older?

  

  Say that yous want to be something else instead, but really pursue your original desire. You are tricking the person copying you to a dissimilar job.

• Question

  There is a friend of mine whom I've fought out with, but she keeps coming back and copying my tastes, like my favorite game, my favorite YouTuber, etc. How should I deal with her?

  

  Some people say that information technology is a compliment if people copy you lot, but I find that irritating. Maybe yous should start to change your style and tastes. Yous could besides only tell the friend how yous feel. Of course, if you guys are fighting all the time anyway, it might be fourth dimension to merely end the friendship.

• Question

  My friend e'er lets other people make her decisions for her. Sometimes I worry if she were ever to get with the wrong oversupply, that she'd make a bad selection. How do I teach her to not follow the oversupply?

  

  You can't alter the way she acts, all you tin do is let her know your thoughts and that you care about her.

• Question

  What can you lot do if yous start getting irritated or frustrated because of them?

  

  Try to stay abroad from that person. Even if that person keeps post-obit you lot, effort to explain to him or her of how you feel. If that person is still making you irritated or frustrated and then try to human action like you don't care.

• Question

  My friend doesn't heed when I tell her not to re-create me. What exercise I practice?

  

  Ask yourself whether this is an of import issue to you. If and so, decrease how much time you spend with this friend, so that she has fewer opportunities to copy you. However, remember that copying is a form of flattery.

• Question

  What if someone says they aren't and when I say they are they just go away?

  

  Madandmad

  Community Answer

  If someone copies you, and you lot are trying to talk most this with them but they get away then it's their problem and it's better for you two to exist apart from each other.

• Question

  My friend copies me a lot, but gets mad super easily. If I tell her to terminate copying me, she'll merely get mad and won't treat me nicely anymore. How exercise I brand her terminate without getting her mad?

  

  It sounds like this person is not treating yous with respect and is perhaps more trouble than she is worth. You should be able to talk almost issues like this, a good friend volition listen to what y'all have to say and endeavor to understand. Attempt to talk it out, calmly and politely. If she refuses to listen or gets aroused, give her some space and really think nigh whether or not you even so want to be friends.

• Question

  It'southward non ofttimes, but 1 of my friends often uses my ideas and just copies me. Information technology doesn't carp me much because I know she sees me similar a office model and isn't trying to hurt me. What do I do?

  

  Tell her you appreciate her loyalty, but propose that her ideas could exist even ameliorate!

• Question

  How practice you cease someone from copying what I want to exist when I'm older?

  

  You could ask him his reasons for wanting to be what you do. If they aren't the aforementioned as your reasons, he'due south non copying you. If he replies with the exact aforementioned answers as you, don't let information technology bother you lot. He probably didn't know y'all shared the exact aforementioned reasons. It simply means you lot accept the same interests.

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• They might get defensive when you lot approach them about it. Be prepared for it to put a rift in your friendship. If it becomes a serious upshot, talk to an developed about it.

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